What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
