i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
