my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.