if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
