Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Holy sore nipples Batman
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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