No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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