Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize