Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
