yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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