O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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