My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
