I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
