Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
