he puts the penis in happiness.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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