thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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