Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
