Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize