Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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