PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
and she was petting her beer can
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
