Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
