It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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