Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
