Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I had to cum in my sink.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
