Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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