gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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