Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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