Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
