My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
