Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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