they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize