Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry MrsBpdx hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches

Fav 6 4402 1006
share tweet
(419): View more from Ohio

her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.

Fav 88 7764 1702
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?

Fav 44 2753 6923
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.

Fav 22 1173 9038
share tweet
(607): View more from New York

please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already

Fav 8 3224 1784
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.

Fav 14 1215 4201
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(678): View more from Georgia

I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.

Fav 9 2787 1195
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(819): View more from Quebec

I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.

Fav 1 499 142
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(604): View more from British Columbia

I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.

Fav 0 48 4
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT