ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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