her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
