I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I just forgot I was standing up.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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