Texts From Last Night

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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Why are handjobs necessary in class?

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  (651): Why are handjobs necessary in class? http://tfl.nu/p9nw
  Replies (28) Good night (2408) Bad night (685)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent

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  (717): i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent http://tfl.nu/5817
  Replies (18) Good night (720) Bad night (4950)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.

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  (416): She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic. http://tfl.nu/pwae
  Replies (10) Good night (3411) Bad night (1501)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages

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  (803): Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages http://tfl.nu/95a0
  Replies (44) Good night (6038) Bad night (1325)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.

  (1-480): View more from Arizona

  Do I even want to know?

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  (480): My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend. (1-480): Do I even want to know? http://tfl.nu/wopv
  Replies (28) Good night (4569) Bad night (1763)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.

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  (317): I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me. http://tfl.nu/xee4
  Replies (8) Good night (2487) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.

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  (920): Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets. http://tfl.nu/3ocj
  Replies (12) Good night (796) Bad night (1694)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.

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  (831): YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL. http://tfl.nu/sk5h
  Replies (21) Good night (1733) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on

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  (616): Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on http://tfl.nu/xayw
  Replies (10) Good night (1324) Bad night (464)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??

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  (505): Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again?? http://tfl.nu/9q8l
  Replies (2) Good night (1130) Bad night (278)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.

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  (360): I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day. http://tfl.nu/9n5p
  Replies (1) Good night (792) Bad night (332)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?

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  (732): How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!? http://tfl.nu/ssco
  Replies (5) Good night (612) Bad night (272)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex

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  (508): This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex http://tfl.nu/5anx
  Replies (2) Good night (597) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now

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  (310): You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now http://tfl.nu/lg51
  Replies (1) Good night (319) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck

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  (631): I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck http://tfl.nu/l2kc
  Replies (4) Good night (978) Bad night (251)

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