Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
