Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
