But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
