Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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