I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
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sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
he fucked my hip out of place.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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