3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize