If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I'm passing your future prison.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
