i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
