I'm passing your future prison.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
