We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
