Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize