I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You are a genius and a whore.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize