I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
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