its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.