I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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