How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
